Monday, March 19, 2012

eDisharmony (3.19.2012)

It's Monday and it's been a long day. The fact that it's a Monday and the fact that I had to be in the office at 7 am makes it a little more challenging than a typical Monday. So it's possible that I'm a little tired, and being a little more sensitive than I normally would be. I mention all this because I came home tonight and after dinner, checked my eHarmony account. The "match" I had been in touch with through the eHarmony Q&A process finally responded to my questions in the open communication segment of our courtship.

After today, I may start to think of this as the English As Your First Language part of the communication process. There were misspelled words in response to each question. There seemed to be no regard for spelling or responding in English. From the brevity of the responses, I thought it seemed pretty clear that he knows this isn't a strength. My hearts goes out. It really does. But I just find it painful to try to communicate with a man who doesn't value expressing himself in even a very basic way.

Don't get me wrong. I am no Dorothy Parker. And I realize that not everyone writes for a living and then comes home and writes some more in a daily blog. I get that. And I can accept a lot. But maybe what I realized tonight is that when I get to this point in the communication, the getting to know you part of the game, I want the big finish: I want a man who can spell. The fact is, I once fell head over heels in love with a man simply from a brief, beautifully written birthday note (not even a card) that he sent me. It was all of three lines and it had heart, humor and class and it made me swoon.

Sigh. I guess this is a good thing to know about myself. Maybe I need to compromise less as I am getting to know someone so I can save all my compromises for the spelling test. Or maybe I just need to add to my profile: "Must love dictionaries."

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