Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Facts About Lip Gloss (3.14.2012)

Looking at the number of tubes of lip gloss I have either in my purse or my makeup bag at any one time reminds of a totally crazytown (more than usual) episode I saw of Hoarders last night.

One of the more pathetic hoarders I've ever seen was confronted by the professional organizer about the double sets of pictures or clothing or some such object she had in her house. The hoarder calmly replied, "Well, I have a TWIN SISTER and you see, I'm keeping this stuff for her." Suddenly, her husband appeared in the doorway and said: "I heard what you just said. I've been married to you for 25 years and YOU DO NOT HAVE A TWIN SISTER. YOU HAVE NO SISTER AT ALL."  

Like I said. C-R-A-Z-Y-T-O-W-N.

So whether or not I am a lip gloss hoarder, I should hardly be pointing fingers considering how much shiny goo I own to put on my lips. And looking at it, displayed in the photo below, one just has to ask: what's the deal? What do I really think I'm getting when I buy a tube of lip gloss?

So, here's what I think. I like to think of it as
Facts About Lip Gloss:

1. A new tube of lip gloss can be
a fast path to a whole new you.
Clearly, I have yearned to be a whole new me lately.

2. Much like shoes, lip gloss always "fits".
Your lips rarely gain weight, unless you've made a visit to your favorite little plastic surgeon.

3. Lip gloss is like SPANX for
women with skinny lips.
After a certain age, and unless you are Angelina, your lips may need a little help. The right lip gloss blinds onlookers making my thin little lips look perky.

Just a few thoughts on a Wednesday night. Oh and don't forget to watch for me on Hoarders: Lip Gloss Edition coming soon on TLC.

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